Well, pretty much as I
originally predicted except the other guy resigned. Bob Diamond left the bank, while Barclays
chairman 'Senator' Marcus Agius returned. Shocked by the intensity of public disgust at Barclays’ behaviour, Mr Diamond said:
"Bloody proles didn't even know what a LIBOR was until last Thursday
week."
To steady the helm at the
troubled usurer, initially Lord Geezer had refused to quit.
"I was quite disappointed,” he confessed yesterday, following his daily
worship before a 20-foot ivory image of Beelzebub. “No one’s sorrier than I am about these events coming
out. I'd hoped to stay on, to ensure nothing
like this is ever detected again."
Leading the applause for
Diamond’s years of valuable service with Barclays is his daughter Nellie. Privately-educated Miss Diamante, 23, rejected
British government criticism of her father which appeared in the press. She tweeted: "George Osborne and Ed
Miliband you can go ahead and #hmd."
HMD is an expression of disgruntlement employed by low-end American
teenagers; money well spent on Nellie’s schooling then.
A handful of jealous
detractors have claimed Ms Diamond is pampered, privileged, and unrepentant over
her ‘show biz’ lifestyle being funded by daddy's piracy. But at least Nellie works for a living; using
her degree in English to the full, she’s been lucky enough to find a job with
Deutsche Bank. Meanwhile Barclays has
sought cathartic resolution to its dilemma, introducing a new savings-account
marketing campaign with hoardings like the one above; in other words, business
as usual.
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